Written by Katy Goshtasbi
Posted on: April 27, 2020
As published in ThriveGlobal
In an age when nothing feels like it is in your control, take heart. There is one thing that is always within your control- YOU and your brand. Let’s talk about ways to self-heal your brand to be in control and get the results you desire in your life, regardless of what’s going on out there in our world these days.
Life has lots of ups and downs. As an immigrant, I know this for sure. My story is full of ups and downs and change. Through it all, I’ve had so many moments that I would call failures. Along the way, I’ve probably had more “wins” than I can admit and even, see for myself. What I have learned is that all of it leads to me healing myself. It’s a process of reinvention and it’s really tough when you are going through it. AND- the process of reinvention is ongoing. We can either participate or not.
How can you self-heal? Here are 3 tips to get you started:
1. Are You Willing?
In anything in life, we always have a choice. Even when we feel our back is up against the wall, we still have a choice. The only question is whether you are willing to self-heal. What does that mean? It requires you to have self-awareness around: a) how you feel now and b) how you want to feel. There’s a big distinction obviously and you may not like how you feel right now, but you always have a choice in how you could feel in the future- if you choose to become (and stay) self-aware. What would that look like? It would require you to be brave and be willing to look at what’s going on in your life right now. It would require you to acknowledge where you are not taking responsibility for your life and instead, playing victim. If you hate everything I am saying, then you get the point.
Believe me, the process stinks. I go through it daily. Most days, I want to pull my hair out and flee the scene. Other days, I get angry. Sometimes it is even rage. What I do know for sure is that over time, the anger has subsided. I have managed to leave my hair in my head and I’m still alive and kicking, getting results. Why? Because I am willing and I am self-aware that I have lots of flaws and am willing to sit in that discomfort for the sake of being better because I matter and the world needs me. Same goes for you.
2. What Stresses You Out?
Our everyday stressors are our biggest blocks to self-healing. According to my research, there is a direct, inverse correlation between our stress and our self-confidence. So as you can uncover what stresses you out and reduce this stress, your self-confidence must go up. That means your brand is more effective- I like you more and want to be around you. What that means is that you are in control of your destiny and you are self-healing yourself.
What does that mean for you? Stop and think, what stresses you out? How do you deal with that stress? Do you ignore it or address it? Is it your new normal or do you regard yourself as worth the time to destress?
I have always craved more self-confidence. That’s why I did my research. When I found out that all I had to do was reduce my stress, I thought “this is easy. I can do this”. It’s not so easy, even if it is very simple. It requires me to constantly stay self-aware of my stress level and then implement tools (deep breathing, meditation, etc) to reduce my stress. Some days it works really well, other days not so well. I don’t stop though. Because the alternative stinks even more.
3. Where’s Your Support?
There have been so many days where I kept asking myself and the Universe, “What about my support? Where is my support?” I kept having a pity party and being a victim. It was awful. It is still awful when I do this to myself. I feel out of control and alone. Those are the moments I’ve trained myself to stop and look around my community (and internally) and seek support. Support allows me to realize I am not alone and that others do really care about me- if I let them care.
What’s that mean for you? Stop and consider: when was the last time you asked for support? Why not? Where do you find support exists for you? Seek out one new place this week to find support. The key is often to show up with the genuine intent to give support.
If you wholeheartedly implement these 3 tips, I promise you will be off to a good start. Need more tips? Check out this podcast interview where I lay out all this information for you. Click Here to Listen to Podcast.